THE DR. HAPPY FORMULA by Dr. Bob Nozik,MD “Dr. Happy,” has been speaking and writing on happiness ever since developing his own deep, inner happiness twenty years ago. Bob is Professor Emeritus from UC San Francisco and is the author of Happy 4 Life: Here’s How to Do It.. Dear Readers, please send your happiness questions to “Ask Dr. Happy” at Pollyannan@aol.com
Ask Dr. Happy
Dear Dr. Happy, I am the mother of eight year old twin boys: David and Donald. Don is very shy while David is loud, aggressive, and, frankly, a bully. Example: last week David tied Don up and put a gopher snake on his neck. Poor Don panicked, screamed, and falling, scratched his face and arm. My husband just says: “Boys will be boys,” but I’m concerned.
Should I Do Something?
Dear Should, While a certain amount of roughhousing is to be expected between siblings at this age, bullying and real cruelty cannot and should not be tolerated. What’s going on, I’m afraid, is bad enough that it raises my concern for both twins; David’s sadistic bullying and Don’s passive acceptance of it. Frankly, from what you describe, I believe you need to consult with a child psychologist. Check with their school. I bet they can refer you to a good one who has experience dealing with this kind of problem. The one thing I would NOT do is take comfort in the “Boys will be boys” platitude. Please “Should,” get help now before this dangerous behavior goes any further and real damage, both physical and emotional, is inflicted.